Well, Kenny the rooster costs a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd
be worth it. So, he buys Kenny.

The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, first,
giving the rooster a pep talk.

I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service
here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a
good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a
chuckle.

Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the Hen house and Kenny took off like a shot. WHAM!- Kenny nails every hen in the hen house- three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that the
farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen, sure enough, Kenny is in there.
Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese, down by the lake. Once
again - WHAM! He gets all the geese.

By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next day, to find Kenny on his back, stone cold in the middle of the yard. vultures are circling overhead.

The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal,
shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried
to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."
Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the vultures circling in the sky and says, "Shhh, they're getting closer".

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him

"One of Colorado's oldest citizens and a resident of Walsenburg for about a century died here yesterday. mrs Quintina was 104 years old at the time of her death, her grandmother said."

The court was told that soon after the party came into Maloney's Bar, Milligan spat at O'Flaherty and called him "a stinkingUlsterman".
O'Flaherty punched Milligan, and Rourke hit him with a bottle.
Milligan kicked O'Flaherty in the groin and threw a pint of beer in Rourkes face. This led to ill feeling and they began to fight.

He pushed what looked like the barrel of a gun into my chest and told me he was going to blow my brains out.

"Well the streakers are at it again, this time at a local football game just outside of Boston. I can't figure out this type of behaviour- I guess they just want to show us they're nuts."