Mousetrap: something waved back...and it looked more like a troll than a person...at first he shudderred...then he understood that it was just the mistress of the house in a fur coat

Mousetrap: it took Sebastian a little while, but he came to realise that he stood upon a platform in the New York subway station somewhere near 42nd street....not somewhere in London.

ArnieTxx: The queens maid hoped Sebastian had recovered from the last thrashing he had recieved. The prince's tutor had been quite angry that day...Sebastian had looked rather dazed.

Tuesday: of course he was a mere whipping boy for the prince...it really wasn't his place to think such things. When the prince made an error it was he wh recieved the punishment...one should never strike royalty after all.

amandalove: a figure appeared from the darkness...it was fernando. " Isabelle...let me help you up, my enchantress..." How did HE get here she thought...

ScarletRose: In jim's hand was a smoking pistol...something that looked like an antique...

amandalove:

"Isabella, my dear...do not seek to frighten this lovely dove...such machinisms do not become you. Jealousy has many forms, but please I bege you...do not allow it to control you. We had our day togther, but there is enough Fernando for everyone. What we had was a glistening moment that has blossomed and passed...it was brief and beautiful. Do not deny Scarlet the same chance at happiness..."
His eyes sparkled,alluring Scarlet with gentile urging...she felt a longing to return to the table. Fernando seemed like such a gentleman...strong...noble...
Isabell was jealous? THat only made sense. She hadn't approached Fernando...and he was a grown up...he had the right to spend time with whoever he wanted...it was amazing that even on a faraway island people still held to their petty wants...Fernando clearly was undeserving of such venom from Isabella...those cast aside were often jealous....what they had was over...now it was Scalett's turn...
She felt herself move toward Fernando...he smelled of sandalwood and basalm...how invigorating she thought....forgetting Isabella was even there.

Horseman:

She noticed that her captor was bound to a tree facing away from the table...Fernando noticed her glance..
"ahhh, my beautiful swan...do not worry about this man. I, Fernando, have seen to it that he will not trouble you again...
It was odd...she thought..she did not even recall where her gag had disappeared..or how she had gotten to this spot overlooking the ocean...
was she thinking of somebody...?
"Have some wine my beautiful princess..." Offered Fernando...and she sipped the wine as all thoughts of friends were forgotten...

Jim Dandy:

Meanwhile another dashing figure appeared. His eyes were filled with dark,amber liquid fire that sparkled with charm....His tan complexion, toned in the sun...his smooth voice detracted attention away from the ancient spanish armor he wore..."Buenos tarde, Scarlet," he spoke in a deep voice soft as only a noble spaniard can entone. "encantada" he almost whispered as he kissed her hand....the word meant enchantment and she certainly felt beguiled.
"My name is Fernando...the real Fernando..." he began. He told her that he had searched the New World or as he put it "Nuevo Espana" with Ponce DeLeon for the fabled Fountain of Youth and the Seven Cities of Cibola with Coranado..he had found the founatain after his return to what they now called Puerto Rico..and his ship had been blown far off course by a storm like he had never seen before...they had drifted through a sea of kelp fighting to keep there small craft going...when they had found this island...Fernando admitted that he had long since discovered the secrets of the island and that he had created the fountain from his mind....He told Scarlet that dhe too would be allowed to drink of it, but unfortunately like all things that leave the island...its gift would disappear within days...all of the island's gifts did so...and if Senorita Earhart was to go, then she would be a very old woman indeed in just a week or so...He himself would certainly turn to dust...With that he smiled and said,"But what is out there when you can live forever? Just be careful...sometimes people think of sea serpents...or monsters...and sometimes other fantasies come true" As he spoke a full moon appeared, candlelight, wine....
Scarlett began to fear the powerful charm Fernando carried...if his story were true, then he was centuries old...and she didn't see any other spaniards about....
"Come my beautiful rose...sit with me a small moment of time. There is food for us and the breeze seems perfect...I promise you will be delighted by this culinary mastery by the finest chef my imagination could recall...." he smoothly pulled the exquisite chair back as an invitation to dine....

because dear girl," the dr replied, "their ae parts in the vaccuum cleaner that are inexpensive and can be made into various types of killer robots...much like a phone booth...."

Skyking: anytime matey

as he began to spin a crazy, cunning plan, the good doctor began to look for vaccuum cleaner parts....

while she was dragging him she talked of whips and chains and reindeer games....he was afraid she might be a little unhinged.

A town entirely inhabited by the ghosts of red shirted ensigns from Star Trek...somewhere in the distance this song was playing....

http://home.wanadoo.nl/~sytze/sttrekkin

star trekkin across the universe...always moving foreward because we can't find reverse....

then he added, "by the way, do you know the Doctor...I think he's with the Queen."
"Who?" asked Tom in shock...feeling that Kirk had escaped more than one fictional account before into others....
"Exactly," responded Kirk.

Skyking: and in the midst of it all was James T. Kirk..reading from a book called Tekwars.
Kirk paused and the spoke the words he'd remember for the rest of his life "We..werejust...going to go swimming in...mynewpool."

Zeke was led to a brightly lit room with another furry blue alien, this one wearing clothes of a sort. It was a simple grey outfit much like a suit. Its fur looked like it had some sort of palmade and it was impeccably groomed. Zeke might have thought it was a diplomat like the aliens said if it hadn't been for the fact that it reminded him of the banker who had handled his wife's will. Damn banker took even the house. Other than what he did overhear from the aliens.
The alien was introduced as Ambassador Summer. While it talked Zeke heard thoughts like tally marks peppering the conversation. THings like...oxygen breather...followed by pecentages of nitrogen and other gases...six....something percentage tall....weight....intelligence low...gullable...bad smelling...sensitive to light....etc.
"I hope you don't mind if we take a few tests so that we can bring such an imposing representative of his species before our monarch," it was saying. WHile thinking, "Diseased...addicted to nicotine...caffine...and various other substances...weaknesses obviously. Must get data to see if it has any use whatsoever. If worth enough will be shown to the head office so I can get a propper bonus for once...if not, I can always sell it to a zoo I suppose."
Zeke was suprised at the gall of the alien. He hadn't met a bigger liar than old Maynard at Tom's bar. Maynard would swear he fought in the war and aske for drinks. Maynard claimed to have been in Korea. Maynard was six when Korea was happening. THe war wound he sported was from cutting wood with a circular saw when he was drunk not from throwing an enemy grenade back. Maynard also claimed to have invented numerous things from fuel injection to bikinis. His stories were entertaining and that made him a better liar than the aliens.
Zeke struck up another smoke just to watch "Ambassador" Summer's nose twitch. "Tests?" he asked innocently, "Like paper and pen or needles and blood?"
"Needles?What is a needle?" the ambassador asked while thinking,"Primitive culture. A swab and a Quidex scan should work...it would be fun to jab a needle into him though...have not used those things in ages..."
Zeke definately did not like how things were headed. Happily he still had his bucknife. "I gotta take a leak," he replied.
Summer looked like a cat that had been petted the wrong way after being covered in dog slobber. "We have facilities down the hall," he said in an irritated way while wondering if this farce was even worth it. Zeke got the impression that summer wanted to do an autopsy old fashioned style on him while he was still breathing. Yeah, Zeke decided, he didn't really like these guys too much. They were like his wife when she used to get pissed at him. Only her weapon of choice was thrown wrenches from his own tool box. She would start out nice, which was a big hint...then start chucking crescent wrenches...the time she lodged a plumber's wrench into the wall he thought he was a goner. Man it was nice and quite until these dang aliens came in to foul things up. All he wanted was a little peace. Obviously that was too much to ask for.

Nirvana:hi again Nirvana.

Now most people thought aliens were little guys with big black eyes, no nose, and a tiny mouth. Boy were they mistaken. At least for the type of alien that kidnapped Zeke and his groceries. These were about regular human size and bipedal. THey were covered in blue fur, and unbeknownst to Zeke had three sexes (male,female, and incubator...but enough about that for now). They had fangs, retractable claws, catlike eyes, and tails. Pale blue underbelly fur contasted the royal blue of the rest of their fur. For some reason Zeke could not help thinking of them as muppets...well, evil muppets that is.
It really ticked him off because his beer was getting warm. Damn aliens. Didn't even offer to put it in a fridge for him, he thought. Absolutely no manners. Angrily, Zeke lit a smoke with his zippo figuring that with such ill-mannered handling he didn't much give a damn if the alien's complained. He didn't ask to be sucked up into their flying saucer. He had places to be. He was going to ask becky out. Man, he had been looking forward to it. Besides he wanted to go fishing on sunday after church. Dang aliens. He finished his smoke and began to chew some of the black jack gum.
It was at this point a couple of the aliens came in and introduced themselves. They said that they were from some place humans called Sirius and seemed a little disgruntled that its common name was the Dog Star. They had a little telepathic ability, but sometimes their own thoughts leaked out. It was like while you were talking to them you could hear whispering at the same time. Apparently they told him that they wanted to make contact with the human species, that they were peaceful, that they had lots of technology to give us, etc. WHile at the same time he heard their thoughts...things like how he was a sample for the buyers at Elgoran. That it would be simple to round all the stupid humans up. How primative these things were. Why would anyone want one anyway? And a vast number of insulting insinuations leaking out. Apparently they could not read Zeke's mind. Weird. It was like listening in on a radio channel you didn't get normally while still hearing the local music. Dang aliens. As they smirkingly withdrew, convinced they had conned the stupid human into thinking that they were taking him to meet their ambassador (who was really just a biological salesman) he tapped his gum into the fur of one of the aliens. He did it by poking it from behind and getting its attention.
"SO you guys like humans then?" he'd asked when he did so.
"Of course,"lied the alien," We have so much to teach you." Continued with thoughts of cages, possible ways of cooking, slave possibilities...It seemed that biological specimens were one of the major means of trade in the galaxy.
Zeke pulled ou another peice of gum. Damn aliens.

Zeke didn't believe in aliens. His crazy father in law did....well back before the accident with the train. He was just a good ol boy trying to make his way in the world. He was born in this small town. He always thought that he'd grow old and die there too. After his wife and father in law had died...it just seemed so peaceful.
He walked out of the five and dime with his weekend supplies. He had about a case of Miller Highlife, a carton of Luckies, some black jack gum, a couple bags of Lays potato chips, and a few other things. It looked like it would be a good weekend.
Zeke was about 5'10 although he tried to convince people he'd made it to 6'0. He was a lanky man. Not skinny. Not weak. He was one of those men who looked thin, but had toned muscles like wire. He'd worked all his life. Little of it was not physical, although he'd been to college and graduated. There was something about office politics he could never stomach, sales jobs just seemed like robbery by pen, and banks that used to pay interest now nickle and dimed people so much that it might as well be theft. Nope. He preferred the feeling of building a shed, or feeding his neighbor's livestock. It made sense. It didn't make him feel dirty this kind of work. Well, morally dirty. He liked the feeling of a good sweat from honest labour.
As he made his way to the old ford pick up. His steel-tipped workman's boots were worn and mud splattered, but that had not stopped him from flirting with Becky behind the counter. He was thinking about going back in ta ask her if she wanted to get something to eat later when IT happened.
"IT" was the big flash of white light that half-blinded him. At first he thought it was the legacy from some youthful experiments with chemicals. Then he found himself on the ship.

as the mysterious woman drove she realised that the tires of the bike were plowing through the pavement, the trees were whispering, and the side mirrors twisted her reflection like she was in a funhouse....on the bike was scratched"Albert Hoffman was here"

The rabbit chuckled, "New ways of bein one with the universe, maaaaaan" and finally found the keys to his blue volkswagon bus...covered in painted flowers.

Out of the bushes popped a white rabbit with a drink, dressed in tye-dye wearing sunglasses and a bandana. Somewhere Iron butterfly was playing...shifting quickly to Jefferson Airplane...."What goin on, Kooky lady?" The rabbit slirred while looking for something on the ground...."Dang....windowpanes...."he muttered before she could answer.

it was someone she had never seen before, staring back at her....

There was an old lady who lived across the street. I never liked her much because she yelled at us for stepping on her lawn. About a day after I saw the pack for the first time they broke into her house and gobbled her and her 13 cats up.

was when the neighbor's doggie disappeared....I was really sad because it was such a nice doggie. We all thought it ran away until....

Buster was the best doggie a boy could ever have. However Buster wasn't really a doggie. He was a cybernetic watchdog model UHD23. He was programmed to play, protect the children, and kill intruders. On day, daddy bought an upgrade for Buster so that Buster could go hunting deer with daddy. I think Daddy installed it wrong because Buster started hunting all sorts of things...including daddy...

Sebastian Spider was called that because great big spiders like to nest in his nappy hair. Cecil didn't care for him too much. George just envied his hair.

Cecil sat watching, munching on his favorite snack of centipedes and grubs...his other favorite was little human children.

George was the oddest troll ya ever did see. Cecil didn't know much about bungee jumping, but doing it in the dark....
He heard a large "crack" as George's head struck the ground. George's form popped up in the air again and a few seconds later another crack followed. Goeorge was laughing hysterically.
"Come one Cecil, ya gotta try this!"
"No thanks George...its fun just watching you..."

He was let go....there was no mushroom in his system, yet the peyote tea he had drink was completely legal due to him being half-cherokee and part of the Native American Church....he got off through a loophole, but would never drink grama red bison's herbal tea ever again!!

Yet, there was popcorn popping in the microwave and little man-like shapes of butter and Jam on his kitchen table....he decided he'd never eat salami and brown mustard sandwiches before bed ever again.

have we frustrated ya enough yet, or are ya gonna write more now?

"wha-wha-what do you sup-supose happened to the puh-puh policemen?" Stuttered the tinman.
"wha-Why don't ya ask her?" replied the Lion.
"Very funny," glared the scarecrow. "What do we do now?"
A bizzare noise sounded and the jawbrige began to lower. An army of Jam and butter men began to ooze its way from the castle. The group heard an erie cackle...It was led by a giant pale figure that laughed in a high pitch voice...like a child. A strange, fat child....it was the pilsbury dough boy all grown up. "hee-hee," it laughed. Mark felt his knees begin to shake...not from fear alone, but also from the giant concussions from the Dough creature's feet.

Bye Skyking...where ya goin bud?:(

"um...Mark," Asked the lion shivering,"Where'd that mad scientist go?"

Thenthe Jolly Green Giant appeared with his amazon wife and sprout. He had a can of beans in his hand and hurled it at the green golem chuckling wickedly.

One of the other munchkins put down his paper,"Look, we are strip mining here not processing bricks. The bricks go to the Emerald city Tourist center. You know as souvineers."
"What about the gravel, Boss?"
"I don't know I think we toss it over there somewhere by those apple trees."
"I thought he was in charge?" asked scarecrow pointing to what he thought was the head munchkin.
"Naw," said the one they called boss,"He's just the head of the morning shift. I'm his supervisor. Dang, oompas went on strike the other day at the factory so some of these lucky stiffs get some overtime. It wasn't a union strike so Jafar's over there clearing the air so to speak. Man, I just hope it stays non-union and none of my guys get mistaken for scabs. Stpid oompas...all over work uniforms. They think they look stupid and demeaning..."
"Anyway," he continued," We were highered by the city planning board for the Emerald City Counsal. Somethin called a freeway is ta be built after we exhaust the strip mines. Just pour in the concrete and whammo! no overpasses or mixmasters needed. We send all the Bricks to that red eyed guy who hangs out with the weasels,"

"well" thought the Munchin for a second," We need to diversify. We have interest in a Diamond mine with several Dwarfs, porkrinds, orange marmalade...er..juice, and won several small buisnesses like the shoe store (run by elvish elvis impersonators who make blue suede shoes for tourists), some fur company headed by this guy Gaston jointly with Cruella DeVille, one small shipping firm..you get the idea." If it was wothwhile ta leave it we would. But we make more profit this way. Why don't you take the red brick road or the green one...or maybe the blue one...its just one road. Are you a luddite?," he asked suspiciously.

actually as they got closer to the yellowbrick road they discovered only 1/3 of the munchkins were working. 1/3 were eating. and 1/3 were reading various papers. It seemed they had a very strong Union...rules enforced by Tweedle-dee, Tweedle-dum, and the Jabborwocky. President Jafar presiding.

the blue cat, named Tom, took the oppertunity to steal the witch's broom and go for a joyride, briefly chasing a small brown mouse named Jerry

THe scarecrow thought deeply.."you know the power source for the microwave would have to be enormous...or of an extreme nature..." At the same time he remembered his old cornfield and the crows. He wondered if the farmer, Rufus Jiffy Pop knew about the microwave...it would certainly explain the giant butter churner...

ooohhh...I seee,"said the scarecrow.."but what does it do to nanotechnology..?"and he thought.

"What's a microwave?"asked the Scarecrow while leafing through the papers later.

"WHere exactly are we going?" asked Techie between gasps. He snuck a peek below to see that his golem was running after them carrying a blue cat.
"You'll know when we get there my pretty!"cackeled the lothesome crone. "you wouldn't want me to spoil ALL the fun now would you." She seemed to delight in Techie's terror and he was moderately certain that the loop-da-loops were unneccessary.

The battle between Techie and the witch lasted for hours finally exhausted Techie Cursed Mark...it was all his fault.
THe witch upon hearing this cackled and evil laugh,"You've given me an idea scientist...let's team up and take care of these upstarts." And they joined forces.
Techie was also known as Dr. X. He had built a great green creature, an imitation of man..a golem that thought it was the incredible hulk...you see he'd accidently slipped a comic store owner's brain into it instead of the trekkie brain he was trying to install...This creature could only say..."No make me mad...you no like me when me mad..." Techie smiled as he summoned his pet...the Green golem was not the only trick up his sleave.

The witch, after hours of trying to decide whether to wear the silver slippers or ruby ones (she decided on ruby sorry Frank) soared quietly to the gingerbread and candy cottage..it took a while to go over the molasses swamp and gumdrop mountains, but she stayed the night briefly at the licorice castle where her old beau lived. In a much angrier mood, but a little glowing she landed and began to set up her wicked trap..she too knew the secrets of butter and Jam men..but the most powerful, the Mamalade mn were also her's to command. She drank some coffee and ate a couple of munchkins for brunch with her leftenet tom (a blue cat who didn't dare repeat the nickname her beau called her "witchy-poo" like that rotten flute did) and reflected in the quiet cottage among the lollipop forest just how she would lay her trap...mmmm...munchkins were good when they were fresh..powdered..jelly filled...her favorite were glazed...

Meanwhile the witch's sister plotted her revenge...she dressed in her most powerful candy-cane striped stockings and grabbed her best broomstick (a fireball 2004). With her favorite crooked hat askew and humming a song that went "fingernails, apple cores, lunch pails too...stir them in my witch's brew, I said ewwwwww..." She briefly teased the talking golden flute she kept in the cage by her bed..which she tortured whenever she could....SHe was known as the witch of the Southwest, and she was very,very naughty. "swat my sister like a fly ayeeeeee..."she grumbled happily. It was not that she liked her sister, but blood was blood. SHe remembered how her other sister had died. Shoved into an oven by two little brats...She was glad that she still had the cottage...she decided to set a trap for the small group.

Back to the party...
As Mark, the scarecrow, the tinman, the lion, and some stray mexican hairless (dog breed) that had joined them entered the woods there was a stirring.
Out of nowhere sprang a shape and before Mark knew what was happening their was a beautiful unicorn. Immediately the lion and the unicorn faced off...like two palukas in a ring...a crowd of animals appeared for an audience...the tinman fetched a bucket of water for the lion's corner...the scarcrow began to rub the lion down waiting for the next bell...and the Jabborwocky was refereeing...

ANd then Mark saw a witch appear...a sandwich with extra mayo...two flaps of bacon hanging from her body like limp appendages...she was riding a bottle of HP sauce and had a voice like Angela Lansbury crossed with an old truck driver with a 2 pack a day habit.....and with a gross motion of her hand she flung grease at the lion who had run for the nearest wardrobe....

for some reason this included his shoes....they were making strange squeeking/honking sounds as they ran...and Mark's feet were still in them...he sat very still and watched as his legs began to stretch for miles...

And that was when the black berry Jam ooozed its way out of an open jar onto the table. It formed a second figure which grabbed up a sugar spoon to wield it at the butterman," I'll have that crust my friend," it bubbled.
"Oh great," said the butterman,"He's always alongside me trying to hog all the glory."
And then the glass of milk turned black, its shape felt warm and soft in Mark's hand...