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31. októbra 2004, 18:52:26
Skyking 
Subjekt: The Stella Awards
Once again, it's time to review the winners of the Annual Stella Awards.
The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled
coffee on herself &successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the
Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United
States.

6th place
19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles, California, won $74,000 &
medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda
Accord. Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the
wheel of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.

5th place
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had
just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the
garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.
He could not reenter the house because the door connecting the house &
garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family were on vacation & Mr.
Dickson found himself locked in the garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a
case of Pepsi he found & a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the house
owners insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish.
The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4th place
Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 & medical
expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's
Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The
award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been
a little provoked at the time, as Mr. Williams who had climbed over the
fence into the yard, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

3rd place
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,
Pennsylvania, $113,500, after she slipped on a soft drink & broke her
coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had
thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

2nd place
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, sued the owner of a night club in a
neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor &
knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was
trying to crawl through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying
the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 & dental expenses.

1st place
This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor Home. On
his trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway,
he set the cruise control at 70 mph & calmly left the drivers seat to go
into the back & make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the RV
left the freeway, crashed & then overturned. Mr Grazinski sued Winnebago
for not advising him, by reading the owner's manual, that he actually
could not do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago
Motor Home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of
this suit just in case there were any other complete morons buying their
recreation vehicles.

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