<Blonde Jokes (or are they factual reports?) A blonde called her boyfriend and said, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." Her boyfriend asked, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde said, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decided to go over and help with the puzzle. She let him in and showed him where she had the puzzle
spread all over the table. He studied the pieces for a moment, then looked at the box, then turned to her and said, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything
resembling a tiger. "He took her hand and said, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of hot
chocolate and then............", he sighed, "Let's put all these frosted
flakes back in the box.
  ASTROLOGY > >Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........and one blonde says to the other:" Which do you think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says
"Helllloooooooooo, can you see Florida......?????
CAR TROUBLE > >A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it
for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor". She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
  SPEEDING TICKET > >A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her
license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
  KNITTING > >A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was
astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN > >A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were
the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going
to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
IN A VACUUM > >A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she
landed on Science &Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you
hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES! > >A girl was visiting
her blonde friend, who had acquired
two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex
and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"   "Hellllloooooo," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs."